


Good in Bed

by Momonoki



Category: Darkwing Duck (Cartoon 1991)
Genre: Alcohol, Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Arguing, Belly Kink, Biting, Blood, Blow Jobs, Death Threats, Dirty Talk, Dry Humping, Fanart, Flirting, Grinding, Implied/Referenced Drug Use, Inspired by Music, Knives, M/M, NSFW Art, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot, Roughhousing, Smoking, Swearing, Teasing, Threats of Violence, Unreliable Narrator, negadrakepad
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-01-15
Updated: 2021-01-15
Packaged: 2021-03-12 19:08:35
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,620
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28765317
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Momonoki/pseuds/Momonoki
Summary: Negaduck is furious when he's knocked out cold in a fight against Dipwing Duck, and instead of continuing the fight, his big idiot of a sidekick drags them back home to the Negaverse.  He wonders why he even bothers with having a sidekick at all...WARNING:  This is PORN y'all, without any of that fancy-shmancy plot stuff.  Negaduck wouldn't bother with it, so why would I?  Also contains TONS of swearing.  His mouth's as dirty as a sewer.
Relationships: Nega-Launchpad/Negaduck (Disney)
Comments: 6
Kudos: 14





	Good in Bed

**Author's Note:**

> The title and a few of the phrases in this fic were inspired by Dua Lipa's song of the same name. As soon as I heard it, I thought of these two idiots.
> 
> This is also my first smut work that I have published as myself (the others have ALL been Anonymous). I'm a bit nervous...but hey, bravery!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just an FYI: I added a sketch I did for a scene in this, so CONTENT WARNING, there's some lewdish fanart that's gonna show up in the middle.
> 
> Also I apologize for this being so long. Thank you for bearing with me.

Negaduck was ready to slug the stupid fuck. Either with his fists or an actual slug, as in a bullet between the eyes. But his gigantic lug of a sidekick should count his goddamn _lucky stars_ that Negaduck was fucking exhausted, and not only didn’t have that kind of energy to spend, he’d also used up all his extra ammo during their fight with that dimwitted Darkwing Dipshit. Somehow, they’d lost extraordinarily, and had ended up escaping the accursed caped crusader to slink back to their destroyed domicile in the Negaverse. 

Well, his _sidekick_ had done most of the slinking, because he’d ended up carrying Negaduck most of the way back home. It wasn’t _Negaduck’s_ fault that he’d been knocked out with a cheap sucker punch by an oversized boxing glove. It wasn’t clear how that huge fist had even fit inside Darkwing’s stupid gas gun, but it packed a decent wallop. Hell, if he hadn’t lost a couple of razor-sharp teeth in the process, Negaduck might have been _proud_ of the little Pollyanna. But he’d been knocked out cold and didn’t have the time or wherewithal to congratulate his nemesis on his sneaky backhanded tactics, emphasis on the _‘giant hand’_ part. He must have been out for a while, because he only started coming to when his big dumb sidekick rudely tossed him down on their ruined couch. And then he remembered.

“You MISERABLE FUCK!!” He snarled up at his second-rate sidekick. Not only was this big fucker being rough with yours truly’s precious merchandise, the coarse rub of his nasty couch against his tail feathers proved that he was now at home, meaning that Launchpad had FLED from the fight, taking Negaduck with him. The big wuss had turned tail and RAN, and that wasn’t acceptable, because HEY, Negaduck’s _reputation_ was on the line!

“Are ya yellower than my goddamn jacket or something? We could have won, you shit!” As he lay there on the couch, he absently rubbed at the sore spot on his jaw, still feeling the sharp jab of that mechanical left hook from Darkwing’s stupid gadget. 

Raising an eyebrow at him, Launchpad was leaning against the wall, his eyes flinty in the dim light. “But ya ran outta bullets, didn’tcha? I sure as hell didn’t have any extra layin’ around.” Then the big fucker crossed his arms and smirked down at him. “Heh, an’ you just layin’ there _flat on yer back_ like some SPENT BITCH wasn’t gonna help win any fight against that asshole.” His sharp, toothy grin was both flirtatious and irritating as _fuck._

_Spent bitch?!_ Negaduck instantly felt a flush burning across his cheeks. _Oh no, you fucking DIDN’T!_ To put it mildly, Negaduck didn’t appreciate this motherfucker’s tone. He was the boss around here, _goddammit!_

Rage freshly kindled and his exhaustion completely forgotten, he leapt off the couch, jabbing a sharp, accusatory finger into his sidekick’s beefy chest. “What I’m SAYING is, **_you dipshit_** , is YOU coulda _done_ something! Put all that muscle to good use! But _nooo,_ instead you _WHAT,_ just dragged us back home? Like a buncha fuckin’ cowards?” He then grabbed a good handful of Launchpad’s dirty shirt, growling up at the insanely tall, big fucking idiot, who only glared at him right back. 

“It’s just like I expected, really. Ya just loooove to DISAPPOINT me, don’tcha?” Then, shoving the big fucker, he violently released his sidekick, and stood there menacingly, clenching his fists by his sides as the rage coursed through his veins. 

Although the fight with Darkwing had left him feeling considerably weaker than normal, his body apparently didn’t give a shit, because NOW he was suddenly crackling with a fresh new well of _pissed-as-fuck_ energy as he stared deep into Launchpad’s eyes, just daring him to _TRY SHIT._ Part of him tingled with anticipation, eager to answer a couple of this big asshole’s thick punches. 

_Just FUCKING DO IT. I fucking DARE YOU_ , he thought, hoping that him and his sidekick could continue the fight against each other that they couldn’t win against Douchebag Duck. Toe to toe, right here, right now, in a big, raging, sweaty brawl. Because Negaduck LOVED to fight. 

He licked his lips, raking his eyes down his sidekick’s muscled, sweaty body, with the occasional large tears in his shirt revealing glimpses of the toned, hunky torso underneath, not to mention that massive, hefty curve bulging between the thighs of those too-tight jeans. 

Negaduck gulped loudly, and the spit felt hot as it slid down his throat. _Well_ … ** _ahem_** _…fighting_ was just _one_ thing that he loved. There were, of course, _other_ rough, sweaty physical pastimes he enjoyed as well. Tearing his eyes away from Launchpad’s crotch, Negaduck flicked his eyes upward again, glaring up at his stupid sidekick. 

There was a flicker of something in his sidekick’s eyes, probably reacting to how Negaduck had just called the big fucker a disappointment. _Was he feeling remorse? Sadness? **Good.**_ Maybe the little shit would learn for next time. Negaduck stuck his beak up in the air, feeling the addictive rush of smug satisfaction wash over him as he easily put his sidekick in his place. Not that it was that _hard_ against this dumb shit. If he knew what was good for him, his sidekick wouldn’t DARE give him any lip, since Negaduck was the boss, after all. What he said went, and whoever challenged him on that fact was good as fucking _dead._

But as soon as that triumphant thought passed through his mind, Negaduck saw that pathetic little gleam in his underling’s eyes turn to something icy, ferocious, and goddamn dangerous. And instantly, it made Negaduck’s stomach clench, and he felt more than a few drops of sweat bead on his forehead as he barely had time to think: 

_Oh, **fuck.** _

In a white-hot flash, he felt a gigantic fist curled tightly around his neck. And suddenly, his whole body was in the air, and the otherwise undisputed Lord of the Negaverse found himself rudely slammed against the wall, as powerless and limp as a ragdoll. The wall cracked a bit under the strain of his ass slapping against the surface, and Negaduck noted with a quick glance that most of the walls in this dump he called home had similar damage all around, some of the abrasions more clearly _ass-shaped_ than others.

The big guy had him completely pinned, and his immense, admittedly handsome mug was just inches from Negaduck’s. Negaduck could smell the cigarettes and alcohol on his breath, and it made him crave a taste. _Y-you know, for the **booze** or **smokes** —the big fucker’s holdin’ out on me_, he thought, trying to rationalize his craving, but that outright lie was quickly forgotten as his eyes fixated on the curve of Launchpad’s equally tempting mouth and that enticing, rough stubble on his chin that he knew all too well burned _so fucking good_ when it rubbed against your skin. 

_This fucking distracting **asshole,**_ he thought ruefully. 

“What I did saved yer fuckin’ life, if ya remember. But I don’t think ya do, ‘cause _SOMEBODY_ got his little clock cleaned, DIDN’TCHA, **_BOSS?”_** Launchpad growled mockingly into Negaduck’s neck, and the dangerous rumble of his voice sent a hot jolt running down the length of the smaller duck’s spine, which burned sweet and satisfying like that first slug of alcohol as it bloomed across his crotch.

Negaduck was gripping and clawing at his neck where the big guy was choking him, and as he struggled against Launchpad’s iron grip, his rage— _among other things_ —was kindling hotter and hotter at the mere _thought_ of this big fucker’s audacity in the meantime. Although he couldn’t move his upper body thanks to the insubordinate shithead, Negaduck quickly realized he could still move his legs, and he swung them out wildly. He grinned toothily as one violent swing struck Launchpad right in that fat, juicy part between his legs, and as Negaduck expected, the big guy groaned and doubled over, releasing him. 

_Well, that was easy._ Brushing himself off, Negaduck leered over his crumpled sidekick, rubbing absently at where the big guy had been choking him. He’d have a couple bruises thanks to this little fucker, but nothing too permanent. Negaduck smirked and smugly readjusted his fedora, which had been turned slightly askew in his dumb sidekick’s pathetic little attempt at murder. Which he ALWAYS failed at doing.

“See, that’s yer problem, you dime-store bouncer _WANNABE._ You coulda finished the job, gone on and killed me off, but ya NEVER _follow through,_ do ya?” Negaduck sneered. Launchpad simply glared up at him through gritted teeth, likely still grimacing due to that cheap blow to his junk. 

Turning away, Negaduck continued to gloat, waving a hand for emphasis. “Hell, you’d never even be able to kill DARKWING, let alone _ME._ That’s why I’M the boss, and you’ll be eternally stuck as my lackey. A SHITTY, _two-bit one,_ at that. Makes me wonder why I fucking _bother_ —"

**_“Unnfffh!”_ **

_Well._ Negaduck really shouldn’t have turned his back on the giant asshole—that was a _slight_ miscalculation on his part—because in a split second, he felt a meaty fist grasp at his ankle, yanking him violently to the floor with a _WHUMP_ , his hat flying off in the interim _._ Good thing he turned his face at the last second, otherwise he would have done a faceplant right into the dirty carpet and lost a couple more precious fangs. 

By this point, his blood was boiling. _This insubordinate piece of SHIT! I’m gonna kill the fucker!!_

Infuriated, he growled ferociously, quickly flipping himself over on his back to face his attacker, curling his fists, which ached to smash into that huge, handsome jaw or maybe those rock-hard abs. He planted his feet wide apart, so he’d be ready to spring up at a moment’s notice. Although some idiots who saw him right now might think he’d spread his legs for another, more _lurid_ reason.

Through his spread thighs, he could see Launchpad, crouching near his feet, smirking down at him, as if he had Negaduck right where he wanted him. Involuntarily, Negaduck gulped under that sexy leer and felt a hot flush to the back of his neck, when he considered the highly unlikely, oh-so-faint possibility Launchpad might’ve gotten one over on him. But _nooo,_ Negaduck was NEVER in a compromising position, _goddammit!_

And with that, the little flash of shame was consumed by sheer anger. The hot blush on his beak was entirely due to pure undadulterated… _err,_ rage. _Oooh, the nerve of this fucker!_

“You ain’t got the best of me, you shit!” And he lifted his legs up in the air, ready to kick the big asshole again, although this time there was no way he’d be lucky enough to land another cheap web-footed shot to the big guy’s crotch. As he thought, Launchpad easily caught his feet, and with a practiced shove, had Negaduck doing an impromptu split, his thighs splayed so embarrassingly wide he flushed scarlet. 

Somewhere in the back of his head an annoying little shit of a voice mocked, _You’re spread so wide a damn plane could land between your legs, ya hungry little slut._ And although it wasn’t an aircraft, there was another huge monstrosity— _namely his gigantic sidekick_ —that immediately filled that vulnerable and increasingly hot little gap, leaping on top of the smaller duck and grabbing him so roughly by the blazer one of the buttons tore off in the scuffle. 

Negaduck might have been more pissed at his impeccable outfit getting fucked up, but instead of yelling at the dumb idiot, he couldn’t help but moan out a long, breathy sigh, relishing that perfect, squishy rub of the big guy’s fat groin between his legs. 

“Aaaahhnnnggghh,” he mewled, entirely involuntarily. He snapped out of it, though, and quickly covered up his, err, _indiscretion_ with a deep, low growl, which was more his brand, of course. 

Launchpad’s mouth was against his neck, each hot breath making the smaller duck’s feathers tingle and each little teasy, prickly rub of that scratchy stubble had Negaduck desperately wanting to do a little rubbing of his own. Shuddering, Negaduck gave his hips a couple tiny, indecipherable rolls— _the big idiot wouldn’t be able to tell_ —savoring the hot press of Launchpad’s heft gliding up and down over his groin. 

_Mmm, nnggghh,_ **_FUCK,_** _this feels pretty good,_ he thought, mind fogging over, but he thought it would be a hell of a lot better if the big guy wasn’t wearing pants either. Feathers on feathers, all ruffled and sweaty, just grinding and rolling… 

His damn sidekick’s yammering jolted him back to reality, where Negaduck remembered they were having a fight. _Oh, yeah._

“Ya really wanna know ‘why ya FUCKIN’ bother?’ It’s like I said before. It’s ‘cause yer little ass would be DEAD without me.” 

Negaduck scoffed loudly, and like he figured, it seemed to rile up the big dipshit, whose voice rumbled deeper and sexier the more enraged he got. _Yeah, bring it, you big idiot,_ Negaduck thought. 

“OH? Maybe yer thinkin’ it’d be better if I wasn’t around? If I was _dead?”_ Negaduck turned slightly, and now their lips were almost touching. All this talk of death was making his heart race. “Well, you’d be fuckin’ dead too, because there’d be _nobody_ to drag yer little ass away from gettin’ fuckin’ KILLED, or fix ya up after ya ALMOST do. But I guess that makes me a SHITTY ‘lackey,’ huh?” 

All the while Launchpad was snarling at him, Negaduck was rubbing, rolling— _well,_ might as well call it what it was— _humping_ against the big guy’s meaty groin, sighing ever so slightly with pleasure at how fucking _good_ that fat, squishy press felt on his own aching crotch.

Then, before Negaduck could enjoy any more of that delicious friction between their hips, Launchpad sat up, still gripping Negaduck by the blazer, and roughly slammed him back down on the floor. It was a good thing it was a _carpeted_ floor, because, _well,_ a certain evil little duck might have been contributed many ass-shaped impressions into this part of their house as well. Even though it infuriated him that this big asshole was always manhandling him, Negaduck loved the outright FUCKING RAGE that it incited in him. Launchpad was like a match to the gasoline that set him ablaze, and tonight was no different.

He squeezed his quivering thighs together, trying to ignore the blaze between them, and glared daggers up at the big idiot who dared to toss him around like this, like a goddamn plaything. Launchpad simply gave him a bored side-eye, as if saying, _Oh, please. Miss me with your weak shit._

As ever, Launchpad was able to fucking PISS him off even with a look. _Oh no, that was **it,** GOD DAMN IT. _

“You big _FUCKER!”_ With a snarl, Negaduck pounced, planting his feet squarely on Launchpad’s chest and grabbing big handfuls of his shirt, relishing the feel and sound of how he was ripping the tears in the fabric even wider. He tried not to notice the solid feel of that big, swelling chest under his fingertips, which itched to roam over its sweaty, muscular expanse. 

“H-how fucking DARE you even DREAM of laying even ONE damn finger on me! Tossing me around, like I’m some little bitch and not your _FUCKING **BOSS.**_ You act like I won’t just fucking _END_ YOU!!” And to make good on his threat, Negaduck reached quickly inside his half-torn jacket, finding his trusty butterfly knife, and pressed it against Launchpad’s thick neck. 

All it would take would be a quick, cruel slash to his jugular, and he’d be fucking _dead._ And he’d deserve it too, the little shit! 

Despite the death threat, a flicker of interest passed over Launchpad’s handsome features, and Negaduck felt himself waver a bit under that hot stare. _N-no, **goddammit,**_ _he needed to reassert his fucking authority!_

With some reluctance— _because wouldn’t it be sweet to finally shut this fucker up for good?_ —Negaduck lowered his knife though, and instead of giving Launchpad that cruel, sharp stab to the neck that the piece of shit deserved, with a tightly curled fist, he gave the big asshole a mean right hook. 

_Thwack!_

Launchpad reeled under the sucker punch, and with the big lug groaning in pain, both of them ended up on the floor, with Launchpad collapsing on his back and Negaduck sitting triumphantly astride the audacious fucker’s huge muscular chest.

“Mm-hmm, that’s what I _fucking_ THOUGHT,” he sneered, jabbing his finger into that broad chest again, to illustrate his point, of course. It _wasn’t_ just to cop another feel. “You really should be fucking GRATEFUL I haven’t killed you. _YET.”_

And with that, Negaduck started to scoot himself down his sidekick’s torso so he could stand up and gloat some more. But Launchpad was so goddamned big that Negaduck’s feet couldn’t find purchase with the ground when he was on the widest part of his chest. Right when his toes were finally grazing the ground, his bottom bumped up against the big guy’s groin, and…

_Oooh, fuck._

For a blistering second, the mighty Negaduck saw little black hearts swimming in his vision, and his cold heart skipped a few beats. He could feel his face reddening at how _thick_ and rock-hard the fucker’s cock was in his pants, pressing insistently up against his rear. Drooling a bit, he rubbed his ass over it a few times, savoring every curve of that huge solid outline, plump and juicy and just _begging_ to be ridden. 

“H-holy fuck, you’re such a slut, you know that?” Negaduck growled, anxiously pawing behind him at the big guy’s zipper. He couldn’t quite get it down, since the front of Launchpad’s jeans was so taut and straining, tight as a drum under the pressure. _W-was it a bit wet, too? The little whore!_ Negaduck felt his eyes start to cross. “D-does me punching yer lights out give you a hard on? H-how fucked up is that?” He stuttered slightly as he resumed grinding his rear on Launchpad’s ever-growing erection, as if all his eager humping against him earlier and _now_ didn’t have the least bit of an effect.

His own face flushed and as red as the one of the evil duck rubbing his chubby little ass all over him, Launchpad had been laying there smirking, rubbing his jaw, where the imprint of a little fist was forming a bruise. “Yer callin’ _ME_ a slut? That’s fuckin’ _RICH_ comin’ from you, boss.” But Negaduck wasn’t focusing on their conversation. He’d discovered something big, thick and hot that was commanding every bit of his attention, and he was like a dog with a bone— _ahem,_ so to speak.

Finally, Negaduck managed to push Launchpad’s zipper down, and because his dirty whore of a sidekick never wore underwear, the yummy prize beneath burst out, slapping a bit against his bare rear. “Mmm,” he growled, in a pitch an octave too high for his liking. Holding his cape to the side so it wouldn’t interfere, he lifted and angled his bottom, ready for a good ride, even if it tore him. But before he could even sit down far enough to get even that silky wet pink tip in, Launchpad grasped him around the waist, holding him tight to his chest, and sat up, preventing Negaduck from what he set out to do, which was have a nice long ride on a big fat dick. 

_It didn’t make any sense!_ Launchpad was essentially cockblocking **_himself._** _What the fuck?!_

Now, Negaduck wasn’t capable of _pouting,_ that wasn’t something the Lord of the Negaverse in his infinite superiority could EVEN DO, but this pissy little duck still was quite _displeased._

“Y-you shit! W-why? You’re such a thirsty little whore, you’re probably fuckin’ drooling just waiting for me to sit on that dick!” Negaduck wrenched his neck around, peering down wistfully at Launchpad’s crotch, where said dick was bobbing between the open fly of his unzipped jeans, the tip dripping a few juicy pearls of slick down that thick shaft. _Oh, shiiiit._ Negaduck felt some drool similarly dripping steadily off a couple of his razor-sharp teeth as he stared. 

_Well._ The big guy wanted it pretty bad, _clearly,_ so Negaduck wasn’t above letting him get some of his tight, hot little ass. Negaduck really was a merciful leader, after all, letting his sidekick give him a good hot fuck. In fact, he was _such_ a good leader, he let Launchpad do it regularly. 

“Uh-huh,” Launchpad murmured, like he wasn’t quite convinced by Negaduck’s asssertion. He pulled roughly at Negaduck’s cheek feathers, forcing him to face him again. “I think there’s some thirsty little whore that lost to Darkwing Dipshit _on purpose_ tonight, and it AIN’T ME. All so he could get home early and get his little ass fucked,” he said, and with emphasis on the “fucked” part, he reached up under Negaduck’s cape, and grasped his gigantic hands onto Negaduck’s ass cheeks, squeezing and petting his plump rear, making a certain little duck’s tail wag feverishly at how fucking _good_ it felt. 

Negaduck flushed deeply at this outrageous accusation, and flashing his fangs, growled at the big, sexy motherfucker. “Yer full of shit! I did _NOT!”_

“Oh yeah? Since when do ya pack just ONE extra round of ammo? And the boss _I know_ don’t get knocked out cold by a SINGLE cheap shot from a boxing glove, neither. Hell, I seen ya were awake loooooong before we got home, SNUGGLING against me an’ shit, lookin’ all _CUTE,”_ he teased, and Negaduck was ready to kill this mocking little shit for even SUGGESTING the Lord of the goddamn Negaverse was anything other than a BADASS and did something like, urggh, _s-snuggle!_

Somewhere in his head, that annoying little fucker of a voice joined Launchpad in mocking him. _Heh, you silly little bitch. You were all cute, just like…what’s that thing you hate?_

**_A little fuzzy-wuzzy bunny!_ **

**URRRGGHHH.** He shuddered violently at the mere thought, bile rising at the back of his throat, and in his ire, grabbed the big dumb idiot by the lapels of his stupid denim vest. 

“Ya want me to stab you for _real,_ motherfucker? Just SAY THAT AGAIN, I fucking _DARE_ you—”

But instead of saying a thing, Launchpad leaned forward, and violently smashed their mouths together.

Suddenly, Negaduck forgot about stabbing, fuzzy-wuzzy bunnies, and nearly everything else. He could only focus on that big hot tongue, flicking in and out of his mouth like the satisfying flames of an arson he’d committed. Eventually, the heat of Negaduck’s anger melted into something else red-hot burning between his legs, and after a few long moments of loud, wet smacks of their lips and hungry moans into each other’s mouths, Negaduck wasn’t so keen on fighting anymore. He wouldn’t say no to a good fuck, though.

When their lips finally parted, Negaduck panted, “O-okay, you shit. Clearly you wanna piece of this ass, so get on with it, you thirsty slut.”

But Launchpad wasn’t done teasing him yet. The big annoying fucker’s voice rumbled against his flushed cheek. “Thirsty? Heh, ya say that like you ain’t been the one just fuckin’ _drippin’_ wet since we got home, BOSS.” Negaduck gave a quick glance downward. Well, the big fucker wasn’t _wrong_ —he’d been hard and wet for quite a while now, and only the tip of his dick was only barely covered by the end of his blazer, the rest clearly visible, pulsing and red against his feathers. Instinctively, he yanked his clothing down over his arousal, a little miffed—he WASN’T embarrassed!—that his sidekick had pointed it out. But he couldn’t hide it long, because with a quick flinging motion, Launchpad ripped off his blazer and cape, sending the remaining coat buttons flying, and tossed the half-ruined clothing aside, leaving Negaduck in just his turtleneck shirt, with his erection just as exposed and _almost_ as red as his shirt. Not to mention his face. 

Roughly pulling the fabric of his shirt aside at the collar, Launchpad nuzzled into Negaduck’s bare neck, letting a few teeth graze and nick at his sensitive feathers, making him shiver. “Mm-hmm, don’t act like ya weren’t humpin’ me like crazy earlier, and that ya ain’t been just starin’ at my dick all night, either. Even when we were fightin’ that Darkwing fucker, you just couldn’t stop thinkin’ about me gettin’ ya home and just poundin’ yer little ass, couldja?”

Mmm… _pounding_ …Negaduck nearly groaned in pleasure as his sidekick’s husky voice sent a sizzling jolt straight to his already throbbing dick, but, err, thankfully, he remembered to retort. 

“I don’t know what the fuck yer talking about! Y-yer just a big fuckin’ liar,” Negaduck sighed, and then his whole body shuddered when, after feeling him kiss his shoulder a few times, Launchpad bit down hard, his teeth breaking the skin. He could feel the blood welling up at his shoulder and pooling even thicker into his cock. _Ooh, God, the pain felt so fucking good._ He felt dizzy as Launchpad continue to kiss and suckle at the blood on his shoulder, and was barely aware that the big fucker had stood up, and had moved them over to their fucked-up couch. 

Launchpad placed him down on the couch, tenderly this time, instead of just flinging him down like a sack of shit like he did when they had gotten home. He knelt in front of him, kissing Negaduck’s thigh, leaving bloody kiss marks like lipstick over his ruffled feathers. With those big hands he kneaded the smaller duck’s hips, Negaduck’s feathers and skin squishing between the pinch of his fingers. Meanwhile, Negaduck couldn’t help but notice that Launchpad was deliberately leaving his aching cock untouched, just letting it pulse there, straining and dripping two inches from the big fucker’s mouth. 

“Are ya gonna blow me or what?” He panted out, feeling sweat dripping down his back and soaking into the fabric of his turtleneck. Damn, if only the big idiot had taken it off too, when he ripped off the rest of his clothes earlier. It was like a goddamn sauna in here.

“Or what…” Launchpad said, looking up at him with those sexy mocking eyes. He kissed higher, and pulled up Negaduck’s shirt, nibbling at the curve of his stomach.

“H-hey, cut it out, you asshole! And get to suckin’!” He wriggled and then stopped dead when Launchpad bit down a HELL of a lot harder on his belly. “O-ow!” He screeched, and he felt pinpricks at the corners of his eyes, tears threatening to squeeze out and down his cheeks. But he’d be _damned_ if he was gonna cry! 

“Hey, that fuckin’ hurts!!” His mouth twisted as Launchpad alternately nibbled, kissed, and fucking GNAWED on him more, and he trembled when he saw how lustful his sidekick was acting as he hungrily pawed at his stomach.

“Mmm,” Negaduck moaned, getting used to the pain, his sidekick’s mouth tickling him and making him squirm. Even his toes were curling with each kiss and nibble to his belly feathers. “Y-yer such a fuckin’ freak, ya know that?” Launchpad didn’t usually get all hot over his stomach like this, so he was a bit bewildered. Something about it was more… _intimate_ than the big idiot usually went for. Usually his sidekick didn’t waste much time dicking around instead of dicking him down—he was _in and out_ so to speak, with none of this lovey-dovey bullshit. 

_Oh well,_ he thought, eyes crossing as Launchpad bit and pulled, his stomach clenching hard—and his cock clenching even harder—at each sharp yank of his sensitive belly feathers. All this felt pretty fucking good, so he wasn’t gonna make the big fucker stop now. He let out another wanton sigh as he was bitten here and there, and when he peered lazily down at his sidekick, he was startled when those lustful eyes burned into his own, hotter than a pack of smokes, Launchpad never stopping those sultry wet presses of his mouth to his abdomen. He could see teeth marks and little bruises forming under those flashing fangs.

“It’s just yer so goddamn _sexy,_ boss,” Launchpad murmured, barely audible, and Negaduck flushed, his ego soaring. _Well, no SHIT, of course he was!_ The big idiot at least _knew_ it. But Negaduck barely had time to relish that smug feeling when Launchpad gave him a final sharp _chomp_ to his stomach.

He thought he’d already gasped loudly at the bite of those piercing, razor-sharp teeth— _God dammit, he’d been chewed to shit—_ but found himself nearly _yelping_ when, without warning, Launchpad dropped even lower, and with a gushy wet slurp, swallowed the smaller duck’s cock down to the hilt in a quick, wet gulp. 

Instantly, Negaduck saw more of those fat, swirling black hearts, and unable to contain his enthusiasm, violently bucked his hips up into his sidekick’s mouth in lusty thrusts so fast and energetic he smugly thought he might give those damnable fuzzy-wuzzy bunnies a few pointers on _How to Fuck._

“Uhhnnnn,” he moaned, rolling as hard as he could into that wet heat. Launchpad curled and swirled his tongue around him as he thrust wildly. Ooooh fuck, getting a sucking from his sidekick rivaled some of the best ass or pussy he’d ever gotten, and that thought made him wanna fuck that mouth even harder. _Aww, f-fuck this felt good. Fucking finally!_

He tried to thrust faster, get every pump farther and _deeeeper_ into that big wet mouth, but his sidekick IRRITATINGLY decided to change the game, and pressed down on his hips, holding him down. The little slut then started bobbing his head slowly, _excruciatingly,_ sliding his mouth up and down Negaduck’s length at a fucking snail’s pace, and Negaduck was writhing under his grip. He’d often pause once he’d slid to the tip, and flash Negaduck a naughty smirk out of the corner of his mouth that wasn’t still hugging his wet, straining cock. Negaduck couldn’t help but moan, aching to just jackhammer the FUCK outta this asshole’s throat. 

“Jesus, FUCK, go faster, you SHIT,” he gasped, trying uselessly to hump into Launchpad’s mouth. Launchpad ignored him, and with each slow, slippery slide, he swirled his tongue expertly to the underside of his cock, occasionally flicking it teasingly over the slit, pressing the tip of his tongue slightly against the hole, perhaps tasting the absolute truckloads of slick Negaduck felt like was seeping out. 

“Aaaahhgggg,” Negaduck cried. “G-go f-faster!” His loins felt like a fucking bonfire. Launchpad was unmoved by his cries, and like the mean little shit he was, seemingly went EVEN slower, surely just to fuck with him. He certainly seemed like he was making GODDAMN sure to suck him down infuriatingly slowly and obscenely loudly, and with each long slide down his shaft he rubbed his mouth gently on the feathers around his cock, like he was giving him a messy kiss to the groin every time he swallowed his dick. Hearing that loud, rhythmic smacking, sloppy slurping sound— _shlurp, shlurp, shllllllluuuuurp_ —of Launchpad’s huge wet mouth slapping hot and wet around his cock was driving Negaduck somehow even more insane than he—admittedly—already was. 

“Hmmmmm….” Launchpad started sighing around his shaft, and this addition to his languid pace and loud sucking had Negaduck’s feet tingling and twitching in the air, and Negaduck was clawing at the edges of the couch, hearing the seams of the upholstery tear under the ripping of his nails. He could feel the rumble of that hot, deep voice tickling up his dick and tingling along every frayed nerve, and after a couple more low hums and sloppy wet slurps from his sidekick, Negaduck felt that familiar pressure building up deep in his groin, hotter and hotter and more and more insistent. _Aw, s-shit, he was gonna fucking cum._

“Aaah-aaaahh, F-FUCK!” He cried, his moans starting to be loud enough for screams. _“F-FUCK!!”_ He was gonna blow his load any second now, and his muscles were tensed up tight as he prepared for release.

Launchpad finally let go of his writhing hips, and it was like letting go of a slingshot. Negaduck immediately bucked as hard and as fast as he could into his sidekick’s waiting mouth, wrapping his legs tight around his neck. Launchpad seemed to welcome the intrusion, kneading the smaller duck’s ass and supporting him as he face-fucked him with abandon. Good thing the big shithead seemed to have no gag reflex, because Negaduck was pummeling the absolute FUCK out of his hot, wet throat now, and in seconds, he was cumming. 

“Ooooh, FUCK, LP~!” He shouted out the nickname he only VERY rarely gave this big fucker, thrusting like mad, pummeling his sidekick full with pump after pump of juicy hot cum. And just like the thirsty little slut he was, Launchpad gulped it all down, smacking loudly as he swallowed. Finally, Negaduck’s frantic humping tapered off; he’d finally milked his orgasm to the last creamy drop. He released the squeezing grip of his legs on Launchpad’s neck, and Negaduck sighed heavily as his sidekick pulled off his softening cock, and laid him back down on the couch.

“Whew…” he panted with the side of his sweaty face against the gross cushions, his chest heaving and his body radiating with that sweet post-climax glow. “Guess ya can use that big dumb trap of yers for SOMETHING decent after all...” 

_To be continued..._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, Negaduck got off, didn't he? But not exactly in the way he'd hoped...Also, there's the whole business of somebody else who hasn't cum yet. I dragged this out way longer than I intended, so I'll have to continue it in the next chapter. Stay tuned for some more dirty duck adventures! ^^


End file.
